Fantasy football players who will wrong me this weekend...

**With a nod to Matthew Berry and his Love/Hate column on ESPN.com**

Last week I managed to pull out a crazy victory in my 20-team Yahoo league, thanks to Chris Hope's 5 tackle, 2 INT game Monday night vs. the Colts. I won by less than 5 total pts--what a comeback. Tougher challenge this week with three LBs and L.T. out on byes. And so I will present a list of musing on the fantasy goings-on this weekend (in no particular order):

1. Terrell Owens - I have a feeling the G-men will be able to shut him down, not to mention the fact that Brad Johnson is starting again and he's like 85 years old.

2. Randy Moss - Matt Cassel has the arm of an 85-year-old, it seems at times. Boy, my team with Moss and Owens as the top 2 picks is really going places...

3. Ryan Grant - Hate to root against the hometown boy, but man, it's like he's been running on his knees all year. Hey, Ryan, maybe you could learn some of those advanced, video-game-style moves. You know, like "jump," "spin," "juke" and other complicated maneuvers.

4. Maurice Jones-Drew - I suppose I should have expected that the hyphenated name would come back to haunt me (hyphenated names are one my all-time pet peeves).

5. Steve Slaton - Not that I really expect much against the Vikings run D, but I have a feeling his stat line will look something like: 15 carries, 9 yards, 2 fumbles, 0 catches = -4 fantasy pts. Just a hunch.

6. When is Chris Cooley going to catch a frickin touchdown? Let's go, Capt. Caveman.

7. Paging Reggie Wayne, your table is ready. Maybe you could return the favor with more than 2 catches this week? And possibly some yards as well?

8. Brett the Jet. By all rights, he should do well in Buffalo, a cold-weather city. But he won't. The Gunslinger's talent is wilting under the media spotlight in NY. Plus, the Bills were my favorite team when I was a little kid. Plus, they have a guy named Youboty, which is just awesome.

9. God help me. My starting WRs on one team are Steve Breaston, Rashied Davis, and Bernard Berrian. And that team will probably do better than the Owens/Moss team.

10. Antonio Bryant - The Bucs play at KC and won't need to pass at all. Like ever.

11. I believe whole-heartedly that Willis McGahee will lay a stinker against the Browns Sunday. And Le'Ron McClain, whom has spurned my brother's teams repeatedly, will vulture a TD somehow.

12. Braylon - he has a high level of sucktitude.

13. Giants D vs. Titans D - Tough call here. I seriously don't know which D will be better. Ideas?

14. The Smiths (Kevin and Kolby) - Terrible teams? Check. Playing vs. tough Ds? Check. Crappy defense on your own team? Check. Both starting on one of my teams this weekend? You betcha.

15. Derrick Ward will have a huge game. Just wait and see. Also, Steve Breaston will be huge. I'm calling it right here.

16. I just dropped Jevon Kearse, so he'll probably sack Aaron Rodgers at least twice this week.

17. That's all I got.