A list of things I know/understand about fantasy basketball, which I signed up for on a lark this year:
1. I have Dirk Nowitzki, Vince Carter, Brandon Jennings (go Bucks), Brook Lopez and Carmelo Anthony on my team.
2. They are good (when healthy).
A list of things I do not know/understand about fantasy basketball.
1. Everything else.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
PWWWMTW - early edition
Boy, did I get killed via the Benson injury/MJD take-a-knee last weekend. Suck it, Trebek!
Anyway, since football starts tomorrow, here goes:
Players Who Will Wrong Me This Week:
Ricky Williams: Just because he's the only RB Miami has this week and theoretically, should dominate.
Anquan Boldin: 100 yds last week. I totally called that. And now he'll find some way to let me down, even against the woeful Rams.
Larry Johnson: Don't get me wrong, there's no way I'm even picking him up off waivers. But he'll still manage to affect my team in some unforeseen way.
The Daily Show: Because the only times I've started him this year, he's done nothing (all the other games, he's been solid-to-spectacular).
Steven Hauscka: Or however his name is spelled. I have to replace you on a couple teams, even though I just added you as a bye week fill-in last week. You can make field goals, you get cut in this league.
Flacco: I realize it's the Browns, but c'mon Joe, couldn't you throw it at least 20 times a game?
Matt Forte: I feel dirtier and dirtier about starting him every week. Am I the only one who thinks he "lucked" into 8 catches for 120 yds last week?
Steve Smith 2.0: Kind of a let down since the beginning of the season. And he's letting Version 1.0 of himself catch up stat-wise, despite a wet noodle at quarterback. I'm already bored with v2.0, and looking forward to the next upgrade: Steve Smith Cubed.
LeSean McCoy: I think he has about 20 touches, but only for 40 yds. Suck
Cutback Suarez: Last chance dude. And the winner of the Colt McCoy lottery is...(if you don't know, the Lions host the Cleveland Stains this weekend in the 2009 Futility Bowl. Go Loins!
Miles Austin: Two first names. Defenses know he can run really fast now. He's cooked and can't be trusted.
A.Bradshaw, Derrick Ward, Run-DMc: Whichever one I potentially have to sub in for Benson (should he not play) will undoubtedly suck, as they all pretty much suck all the time anyway.
Cutler: He throws for over 300 yds and gets 2 fantasy points? I had no idea he was such a turnover vulture. He's even stealing them from other teams!
That's it. Go football. and go Cedric Benson n Hedges
Anyway, since football starts tomorrow, here goes:
Players Who Will Wrong Me This Week:
Ricky Williams: Just because he's the only RB Miami has this week and theoretically, should dominate.
Anquan Boldin: 100 yds last week. I totally called that. And now he'll find some way to let me down, even against the woeful Rams.
Larry Johnson: Don't get me wrong, there's no way I'm even picking him up off waivers. But he'll still manage to affect my team in some unforeseen way.
The Daily Show: Because the only times I've started him this year, he's done nothing (all the other games, he's been solid-to-spectacular).
Steven Hauscka: Or however his name is spelled. I have to replace you on a couple teams, even though I just added you as a bye week fill-in last week. You can make field goals, you get cut in this league.
Flacco: I realize it's the Browns, but c'mon Joe, couldn't you throw it at least 20 times a game?
Matt Forte: I feel dirtier and dirtier about starting him every week. Am I the only one who thinks he "lucked" into 8 catches for 120 yds last week?
Steve Smith 2.0: Kind of a let down since the beginning of the season. And he's letting Version 1.0 of himself catch up stat-wise, despite a wet noodle at quarterback. I'm already bored with v2.0, and looking forward to the next upgrade: Steve Smith Cubed.
LeSean McCoy: I think he has about 20 touches, but only for 40 yds. Suck
Cutback Suarez: Last chance dude. And the winner of the Colt McCoy lottery is...(if you don't know, the Lions host the Cleveland Stains this weekend in the 2009 Futility Bowl. Go Loins!
Miles Austin: Two first names. Defenses know he can run really fast now. He's cooked and can't be trusted.
A.Bradshaw, Derrick Ward, Run-DMc: Whichever one I potentially have to sub in for Benson (should he not play) will undoubtedly suck, as they all pretty much suck all the time anyway.
Cutler: He throws for over 300 yds and gets 2 fantasy points? I had no idea he was such a turnover vulture. He's even stealing them from other teams!
That's it. Go football. and go Cedric Benson n Hedges
Thursday, November 12, 2009
PWWWMTW list - 11/12/09
List is early this week due to a Thurs night Bears/Niners game. So let's get on with it.
Megatron: You're on the list until you prove you deserve to be taken off.
Vernon Davis: I don't know why, but I feel like this is the week Vernon Davis does his best "Vernon Davis" impression, instead of the "Owen Daniels" impression he has been enacting the past few weeks.
Joe Flacco: Cleveland--especially Quinn--will be fired up to play on a Monday night, and Ray Rice will simply run the ball every single play.
Matt Forte: You, sir, are the new Star Wars movies of NFL running backs this year. Tons of promise. Proven goodness in the past. Total suckitude now.
Ahmad Bradshaw: Aha! Thought you were safe, didn't you? Just because you're on a bye, doesn't mean you can't still let me down somehow.
Jamaal "I'm not Larry Johnson" Charles: Two first names--can't trust him.
John Carney: I know, I know, he's a kicker. Who cares, right? Well, I will probably need a big game from the ageless Carney, and since he plays the St Louis Lambs, he'll have a mere 8 pts (all XPs, of course)
Broncos D/ST: Against all odds, this is the week Jason Campbell remembers he's an NFL quarterback and awakens his inner Sonny Jurgensen.
Neil Rackers: Just added you as a bye week fill-in. Now you will promptly miss 3 field goals.
Nate Burleson: I just don't like you.
Shonn Greene: Just because I'm starting you over Cutback Suarez. I don't expect a Chris Johnson, 220-something yd game, but 12 pts would be nice. Sadly, I think it's too much to ask.
Kevin "Cutback Suarez" Smith: Plays the Williams Wall and Jared "The Mad Lumberjack" Allen (good nickname, eh?)
And a new feature, some sleepers! Yeah!
Brent Celek: But just because I still can't figure out how to pronounce his name.
Sidney Rice, Visanthe Shiancoe: Both will get a bunch of yds and a TD. And I think one of those TDs will be on a pass FROM Adrian Peterson.
MJD, MSW: Hyphenated names are the rage right now.
Anquan Boldin: 120 yds and a TD. That's right, you heard me.
Zach Miller: Because he's the ONLY receiving "threat" on the Raiders (mostly because JaMarcus can't throw it farther than 5 yds with any sort of accuracy)
Later.
Megatron: You're on the list until you prove you deserve to be taken off.
Vernon Davis: I don't know why, but I feel like this is the week Vernon Davis does his best "Vernon Davis" impression, instead of the "Owen Daniels" impression he has been enacting the past few weeks.
Joe Flacco: Cleveland--especially Quinn--will be fired up to play on a Monday night, and Ray Rice will simply run the ball every single play.
Matt Forte: You, sir, are the new Star Wars movies of NFL running backs this year. Tons of promise. Proven goodness in the past. Total suckitude now.
Ahmad Bradshaw: Aha! Thought you were safe, didn't you? Just because you're on a bye, doesn't mean you can't still let me down somehow.
Jamaal "I'm not Larry Johnson" Charles: Two first names--can't trust him.
John Carney: I know, I know, he's a kicker. Who cares, right? Well, I will probably need a big game from the ageless Carney, and since he plays the St Louis Lambs, he'll have a mere 8 pts (all XPs, of course)
Broncos D/ST: Against all odds, this is the week Jason Campbell remembers he's an NFL quarterback and awakens his inner Sonny Jurgensen.
Neil Rackers: Just added you as a bye week fill-in. Now you will promptly miss 3 field goals.
Nate Burleson: I just don't like you.
Shonn Greene: Just because I'm starting you over Cutback Suarez. I don't expect a Chris Johnson, 220-something yd game, but 12 pts would be nice. Sadly, I think it's too much to ask.
Kevin "Cutback Suarez" Smith: Plays the Williams Wall and Jared "The Mad Lumberjack" Allen (good nickname, eh?)
And a new feature, some sleepers! Yeah!
Brent Celek: But just because I still can't figure out how to pronounce his name.
Sidney Rice, Visanthe Shiancoe: Both will get a bunch of yds and a TD. And I think one of those TDs will be on a pass FROM Adrian Peterson.
MJD, MSW: Hyphenated names are the rage right now.
Anquan Boldin: 120 yds and a TD. That's right, you heard me.
Zach Miller: Because he's the ONLY receiving "threat" on the Raiders (mostly because JaMarcus can't throw it farther than 5 yds with any sort of accuracy)
Later.
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